Synopsis

President Arnot Thinkinear is a self-serving egomaniac who has followed the economic plan of a billionaire madman and the result is that the country is in a financial shambles just when he’s trying to get elected for a second term.

Suddenly, without any warning, a large UFO lands on the Mall right near The White House.  Are they friendly or here to invade our planet?  Turns out they need our help.

Ironically, their space craft emits a substance that is initially thought of as a possible contaminant, but later found out to be platinum.

Eureka!  A solution to correct the economy.  Although, President Thinkinear can’t resist trying to siphon off some for himself and his Chief of Staff, Powers Wayning.

They are caught red handed by General George S. Trojan and exposed by Chase Storyman and Lilac Hellowitz of YMI News.

Meanwhile, General Trojan becomes fast friends with the three Aliens who realize that he is in love with the President’s Secretary, Lola Clematis, and they can’t resist trying to help.  After all… Love IS universal… Isn’t it?

In the end, in order to save the country, General Trojan retires from the Army to answer his country’s call to run for President.

Once in the Oval Office, his new Secretary forms an unusual bond with a very excitable representative from the UN and the laughs continue.

The play is positively wacky and promises no end of laughter.  It ends with Chase Storyman and Lilac Hellowitz being invited to visit the planet “Quirdmut” along with a Diplomatic Party from Washington DC., Consisting of Senators Les Manley and Mona Lotte.

This visit is recorded on an audio CD and made available for purchase on the way out of the theatre so that the audience can hear the result of the trip. (A great ancillary to make additional money for the Theatre.)

Cast of Characters

Cast Size = 14

• FOIT – Visiting Alien – Silver man with rigid posture.  His facial expressions always remain the same.  He never smiles, and he always looks very serious.  He is here from the planet “Quirdmut”.
• GNUDT – Visiting Alien – Silver man with rigid posture.  His facial expressions always remain the same.  He never smiles, and he always looks very serious.  He is here from the planet “Quirdmut”.
• LOODIGUN – Visiting Alien – Silver man with rigid posture.  He is a big Elvis fan and takes on his persona. He is here from the planet “Quirdmut”.
• ARNOT THINKINEAR – PRESIDENT – (mid 60’s)  First name is pronounced “Are Not” – Self centered, less than honest, shifty and slippery.
• POWERS WAYNING – CHIEF OF STAFF to PRESIDENT THINKINEAR – (late 40’s) – Attractive, well dressed, well spoken man.
• GEORGE S. TROJAN – GENERAL later becomes PRESIDENT – (in his early 50’s) Strong, handsome, patriotic, military type.
• LOLA CLEMATIS – SECRETARY to PRESIDENT THINKINEAR – (early 40’s) A very attractive, intelligent woman.
• CHASE STORYMAN – YMI NEWS ANCHOR – (late 30’s) – Attractive male TV personality.
• LILAC HELLOWITZ – YMI NEWS ANCHOR – (mid 30’s) – Attractive female TV personality.
• SUNNY DAY – SECRETARY to PRESIDENT TROJAN – (early 50’s) – A former Drill Sargeant in the Army.  She looks frail but she’s tough as nails.  Cranky but endearing.  She speaks blandly and never cracks a smile.
• ISHA SHAMI – UN AMBASSADOR REPRESENTING “UNOOSA” (United Nations Office of Outer Space Affairs) – (mid 40’s) – A very excitable man from the country of India.
• SHELBY DUNN – CHIEF OF STAFF to PRESIDENT TROJAN – (late 40’s) – Attractive, well dressed, well spoken man.
• SECRET SERVICE #1 (mid 20’s) Strong, handsome, well built male.
• SECRET SERVICE #2 (mid 20’s) Strong, handsome, well built male.

Production Notes

TIME:  The Present

PLACE: Washington, D.C.

SETS:  On stage is the “Oval Office” with a smaller “Outer Office” for the Secretary to the side.  Everyone enters through the secretarial office to get to the President.

When the “News Media” (Chase Storyman and Lilac Hellowitz) speak, they are either off-set and under a spotlight, or off-stage voices.

There is a navigation bar at the bottom of the script sample.  From it you can turn the page, enlarge part of the view, expand to fit the full screen, or download the pdf.  If you enlarge to full screen, pressing the ESC key will return you here.

Your Materials Package Includes:

• 19 Scripts
• 1 Press Play CD of Sound Effects

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